On The Outside Looking In

On The OutsideDepression is a condition that seems to prevail within this unique little community of ours. For those of us that suffer from it, depression is a very real and debilitating condition. Now in my 40s, I’ve suffered since my late teens. The photo above, depicts, how it often makes me feel. No, not naked, per se, although there is a vulnerability that comes with it, but a feeling of always being on the outside, the fringes, the periphery; looking in, not fully engaged.

That’s not to say I don’t have wonderfully supportive friends and family, because I do, and I possibly wouldn’t still be here without them; but those of us who suffer will recognise the feeling of being alone, even in the company of our nearest and dearest. It’s not that we are actively excluded, we exclude ourselves, we hide away, we shut ourselves off.

In some ways, it defines me. I am the person I am because of it. I’ve learned to accept it; I wear it like a familiar coat.

Someone once asked me if I get a thrill from posting the photos I take. The honest answer is, that for me, it’s more a kind of creative therapy. Even when I’m feeling shit about myself, the lovely comments I get from the #SinfulSunday and wider Sex Blogging communities. are always accepting, always supportive. Perversely, despite us being, in the main, a collection of widely scattered individuals, it is one group that I feel very much a part of. It’s inclusiveness reaches out and draws me into it.

It is a community that I feel very lucky to have stumbled upon and proud to be a part of.

KW

Who else is sinning this Sunday?
Click on the lips below to find out.

Sinful Sunday

Scavenger Hunt Silver

25 thoughts on “On The Outside Looking In

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  1. This was very thought-provoking. I’ve struggled with managing my depression for the majority of my life (and at this stage don’t believe I’ll ever be able to get on without my anti-d’s).

    Lovely Scavenger Hunt notch, though!

    xx Dee

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  2. I know exactly how you feel I have suffered from depression since my early teens and I have many many time felt like I was on the outside of myself looking in…great post

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  3. Great photo, great illustration of how you feel at times. This little corner of the internet that we have all stumbled upon is a fabulous community and a place of refuge. Where support, understanding and encouragement flow so readily.
    Lady E xx

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  4. What a beautifully written, articulate post. I’m sorry you feel like this but I am glad the merry band of online friends offers support and strength. And this is a really great photo. Nice arse! 😉 xx

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  5. This is a very powerful image, it really does illustrate the points you make about how it feels to suffer with depression perfectly. I am glad that the Sinful Sunday community and sex blogging community has helped in some small way. I love being part of this group and it gives me great pride to have created a meme that encourages people to express themselves and find new and inspiring things out about themselves and their bodies

    Mollyxxx

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  6. I love this. I think all of us feel that way so often and the picture is a beautiful representation of it. And the view is amazing too.

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  7. I had a depression problem in my teens but my overarching issue is social anxiety coupled with OCD, and my major coping mechanism is avoidance, so I certainly know how that feels.

    On a lighter, more immature note.

    Butt.

    That is all.

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  8. This is beautiful. It’s exactly how I feel about this community, thanks for putting it into words. Also, this photo is lovely, the composition and color are wonderful and the pathos is tangible. Really excellent!

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  9. Oh, what a great post! Yep, one of the ranks here, I think you’ve put it so eloquently.

    I also appreciate a fine posterior… Looks like you got that covered, as well😇😇😇💜

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  10. I know exactly how you feel. I’ve always felt like this, even in the middle of things, never really feeling as if I were involved. I know a lot of it has to do with how I see myself, being afraid to let anyone in. But even in the few short weeks I’ve been blogging and even though all the interaction has been online I finally feel like I’m getting somewhere with how I feel about me.
    Your photograph sums it up perfectly 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

  11. I’ve always loved how open and honest you are about these things. That is also a fabulous image which, as well as being incredibly sexy, compliments the piece so well.

    Liked by 1 person

  12. Depression runs in my family and my husband has it too. I succumb every so often to the prevailing mood atmosphere but try as hard as I can not to stay under for long. Depressed Dragons are dangerous…

    ~Kazi xxx

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  13. This resonated with me: “It’s not that we are actively excluded, we exclude ourselves, we hide away, we shut ourselves off.”

    I don’t suffer from depression, not all the time that is, but I have my ups and downs and when I am in a down, I don’t feel connected to those around me and have the feeling that they are shutting me out, even though in my rational mind I know that your words above are more true, that I am shutting myself out. Yet, knowing this doesn’t help me to get from a down to an up… it just doesn’t work like that.

    Great photo though!

    Rebel xox

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  14. Thank you Sir. This is well shown. I too have lived with depression and anxiety since my late teens. Puberty hit me so hard that it fried my brain. I had visions so perverse and vivid I believed myself a monster. It has been my gift though. If I let the visions fill me, it feels like I am there feeling their breath, tasting their skin and it makes my writing so grounded. This may not be the best time to say this but what the hell, from heels to ass you are a model of male form.

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  15. The illustration expresses your words well. I’ve never experienced depression but I’ve seen it’s affect on the lives of my friends and loved ones.

    Like

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